


99 Problems but a knot ain't one of them.

by Panatlantic



Series: 99 problems [1]
Category: Merlin (TV)
Genre: Alpha Arthur Pendragon (Merlin), Alpha/Beta/Omega Dynamics, M/M, Omega Merlin (Merlin)
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-10-01
Updated: 2020-10-01
Packaged: 2021-03-07 17:28:21
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 2,200
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/26751340
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Panatlantic/pseuds/Panatlantic
Summary: Omega Merlin commits treason... after a fashion.
Relationships: Merlin/Arthur Pendragon (Merlin)
Series: 99 problems [1]
Series URL: https://archiveofourown.org/series/1948336
Comments: 19
Kudos: 262





	99 Problems but a knot ain't one of them.

Arthur had been minding his own business and definitely not brooding over the fact that his manservant had quit with a grievance. His father had been unnecessarily harsh about the whole thing insisting Arthur was at fault. And maybe Arthur shouldn’t have mentioned that he wouldn’t have had to keep getting his servants to clean the stables if Uther’s appreciation for stable boys didn’t keep driving them away.

He sighed into his ale. Then it happened.

An omega walked into the inn, cloak pulled up, shielding his face, but nothing could disguise the presence. Omega were rare in Camelot… in Albion… pretty much everywhere. Only two or three a year came to present to the King. Like all omega, this one flitted around like he was invisible, despite being watched closely by every alpha in the room. The beta’s of course weren’t stupid enough to show any interest at all and resolutely looked away and minded their own business.

The omega skirted the tables, stopping to stare at one man who froze awkwardly at the scrutiny with one finger stuck up his nose. Crouching low the omega watched a guard that was scratching at his crotch before inspecting a barrel chested beta in a bright red shirt who nervously sipped at his ale while not making eye contact. Clearly the inspection had been passed because he then went to the counter to speak with the innkeeper.

Arthur went back to his maudlin thoughts. Omega’s were the Kings property and he was not yet the King (as his father liked to constantly remind him). Because of this, he was unprepared for when the omega approached him.

“You there! How much for the night?” Merlin demanded imperiously - which was a rather direct contrast to his peasants smock.

“Excuse me?” Replied Arthur, incredulously. There may have been a snort. And definitely a raised eyebrow.

“Don’t look at me like that! I have coin!” The omega brushed his hands down his thigh to jingle his purse. “Can you fuck me or not?”

The Alpha continued to look appalled. Merlin cocked his head to the side, wondering if he had misjudged the alphas age or committed some other faux pas. It was, after all, his first time doing something like this.

Two summers ago he’d overheard Will’s cousin (who we should know was very worldly indeed and had travelled to both Camelot AND Fyrien) telling Will about prostitutes, and Merlin was moderately sure he was doing it right. Go to tavern (check), find the most gaudily dressed person with largest chest (check) ask for price (check). Merlin wasn’t bragging, but he could go as high as 15 pence if he had to.

“I have a room upstairs.” Added Merlin to sweeten the deal when the flabbergasted alpha didn’t speak. “Make up your mind already.” Merlin glanced around nervously, hoping he wouldn't have to go back to the nose picker.

This was necessary. Kanen had been sniffing around a half dozen times and mothers’ herbs wouldn’t fool him forever. If Kanen didn’t catch him in a heat then it was only a matter of time before someone noticed an unknotted omega walking around Ealdor and dragged him off to court to get his first knot. No. Better to get this over with under his own terms.

* * *

Four pence.

Arthur’s time with an omega was worth exactly four pence. AND the omega had been quite firm that he would be expecting Arthur to bring his own food supplies.

It was both… flattering and insulting at the same time. Flattering that this bossy omega had picked him (and yes the bossy git had made it quite clear that he had not been spoiled for choice when he ‘selected’ Arthur). Insulting because Arthur had socks worth more than four pence.

“Well come on then!” Demanded Merlin, sitting on the bed and spreading his legs. “Stick it in!”

“That’s not... are you sure you’ve done this before?” Asked Arthur seriously. He knew some omegas presented early so for all he knew the kid could be on his third or forth heat, but he seemed ridiculously inexperienced.

“I grew up on a farm, so I think I know how the mechanics work!” Decried Merlin, now on his hands and knees, shaking his buttocks meaningfully.

“What?!? No! Just… you need to take off more clothes… the pants at least.”

“I… I knew that.”

“…and if it’s your first time…”

“I’m not going to the castle to give some noble prat the opportunity to deflower me. Not that that is what this is. Because it’s definitely not my first time.“ Claimed Merlin impatiently. “I can’t even begin to tell you how many knot’s I’ve had shoved up there. All the way in. With their…“ Merlin glanced at Arthurs erect manhood and grimaced a bit. “…veineyness. Is that normal? Is it meant to be that big?”

Arthur rolled his eyes. “It’s not like that. Presenting at court gives omega’s an opportunity to find work and a good mate.”

“Pfft. Makes it easier for the king to recruit soldiers you mean. What alpha doesn’t want to work at the place that every omega is required by law to present?”

“The King doesn’t need…” Started Arthur before he was interrupted.

“Oh..? Would that be the honorable King Uther? He would never enforce something as archaic as primae noctis…” Merlin intoned sarcastically. Although there was a rumor that Uther gave his bed warmers five silver schillings if they pleased him, which wouldn’t have been so bad, but Merlin couldn’t risk his magical nature being revealed for the sake of warming Uther’s bed. Naturally, it was still better than going to Cenred who was rumored to share newly presented omegas around the barracks.

Arthur grimaced. His fathers infatuation with virgins was stemmed in a deep seated fear of contracting the burning sickness, which meant he was more than willing to take advantage of any omega that came his way. In fact Arthur could not recall a single omega presenting that his father had not bedded, so he changed the topic. “If it were your first time, there’s things I’d have to do to make it easier for you. So it won’t hurt as much.” He said instead.

“Are you drawing this out so I have to pay you more?” Accused Merlin with narrowed eyes. But he slipped off his tunic and trousers regardless. “Fine! Get on with it. Do your ‘preparations’.” He then proceeded to ignore Arthur altogether and stare at the wall.

Arthur’s ‘preparations’ seemed to involve a lot of prodding around Merlin’s bum hole that was both awkward and disturbingly lewd. “I’m going to have to bite you.” Murmured Arthur, uncomfortably close to Merlin’s ear causing him to shiver. “Not a mating mark, just a nip to get your heat started.” He nuzzled against Merlin’s neck and waited for permission.

“If you have to.” Actually, a mating mark would be an even better option. He could return home and not have to worry about heats at all then. “Wait! Stop!” He sprung up smacking Arthur in the chin with the back of his skull.

“Why?” Asked Arthur with a groan, half drunk on Merlin’s pre-heat scent (and if concussed, only slightly).

“That’s brilliant! You could give me a mating bite!”

“What?!? Merlin! No!!” Denied Arthur.

“Merlin Yes! This is the best idea ever! If you mark me, no one will even suspect I’m a virgin!”

Arthur groaned again, which probably had much to do with Merlin wriggling around to face him and accidently hitting his member in the process. Merlin apologized to it, patting it absently before kneeling to look Arthur in the eyes.

“I won’t mark you Merlin.”

“How much? For just the mating mark. You wouldn’t even have to do the fucking. I can just rub a bit of nettle back there, no one will know the difference.”

“Merlin, no one is going to believe you were knotted from a nettle rash.”

Merlin waved him off absently. “It’s fine, it’s fine, I’m the only omega in the village. They have no point of comparison.”

“If I mark you, you’ll be bound to me permanently. You won’t be able to go into heat without me.”

“Exactly!”

“What if you decide you want children?”

Merlin genuinely cringed at the concept of children. “I won’t! This is perfect!“ Merlin tilted his head back, exposing his neck. “Do it!”

“No!”

“No? Well… I mean I can see how it would be bad for business to bite all your customers, but consider this.” He bent over to retrieve his purse, pulling out a handful of coins. “A whole shilling!”

“Merlin! If I bite you I can just take all your money. You’d be powerless to stop me.”

“Well jokes on you, 12 pence is all I have anyway. What do you care? Alpha’s can bite any number of omega anyway. The King bites almost every omega that goes through the palace to assure their loyalty. If the king doesn’t care about their future plans, why should you?”

“Merlin, you do realise what you’re saying is tantamount to treason? You could be imprisoned for saying those things about your king! I could be imprisoned for even taking a virgin omega!”

“Not my king!” Muttered Merlin, rolling his eyes. “I pay taxes to Essitir.” Clearly he had gotten the point because he didn’t bring up the mating bite again. “Lucky I’m not a virgin then.”

“You literally just said…”

“Sooo many dicks Arthur… I’ve had sooo many….”

+++

“Arthur! Arthur!” Hissed Merlin. “Arthur wake up!”

“What is it Merlin?”

“Your thing… your… your… clot-pole. It won’t come out! It’s stuck in me!”

“It’s supposed to do that Merlin. It’s normal.”

After a few minutes of squirming Merlin piped up again. “You-normal or all alpha-normal?”

“It’ll release on it’s own. Just go to sleep.”

“Are you sure it’s not broken? I think I heard something break.”

“Merlin. Go to sleep.” Begged Arthur.

* * *

“Arthur! Arthur!” Hissed Merlin. “Arthur wake up!”

“Mpff?” Replied Arthur eloquently. He’d knotted Merlin three times already and was hoping to get a little sleep before dawn.

“There’s stuff. Leaking out of my bum. It’s going everywhere. I knew I heard something break. Arthur. Arthur!”

“Merlin. Go to sleep.” Begged Arthur.

* * *

“Arthur! Arthur!” Hissed Merlin. “Arthur!”

“Mpff?” Replied Arthur.

“I’m going to eat this chicken. I’m eating it okay?’

* * *

When Arthur woke up the next morning, Merlin was gone. (So was the chicken)

* * *

“That is correct sire. I was on my way to the castle to present myself, when I was set upon by scoundrels most fierce and cunning. They used me like a common doxie and shamefully... I admit to being now deflowered.” Merlin peeked up to assess Uther’s response. “Absolutely despoiled. Violated. Repeatedly. This lowly one is embarrassed to stand before you.“

“Bandits?” Snarled Uther. Because even with the soot and horse dung Merlin had taken care to rub into his hair and breeches his potential was obvious. “In my woods?”

“Yes Sire. Quite horrible ones. Absolutely filthy! And to make matters worse, left me with a nasty rash on my nethers. Do you want to see?” He tugged at the ties on his breeches (because he hadn’t rubbed nettles on there for naught).

“Sire, I can vouch for what the boy says.” Interrupted Gaius. “There is indeed a nasty rash.”

“Right itchy.” Prompted Merlin rubbing at his crotch. “and the smell...“

“Yes. Yes.” Gaius waved the boy silent when Merlin went to elaborate further.

“Is there anything we can do to eliminate his discomfort Gaius?” Allowed Uther, because virgin or not, Uther had a type (omegas with legs).

“I’ve given the boy a draught to prevent… complications.” Admitted Gaius, raising his brow so it was clearly understood he meant to prevent an unwanted pregnancy, “and a poultice to help with the swelling.”

“It burns when I pee!” Piped up Merlin.

“Disgraceful!” Remarked Uther.

“Indeed! Quite vile! I think the best thing would be for me to go home in disgrace and never return to Camelot.” Declared Merlin, picking at his nose to show how utterly disgraceful he could be.

“Disgraceful!” Exclaimed Uther again, clearly not having registered Merlin’s rambling at all. He turned an accusing glare on Arthur. “These bandits have grown so bold that they would take one of the Kings omegas and then release him to taunt me? Send out a patrol immediately. Arthur! I want these brigands dead before the week is up!”

“Yes Sire.” Bowed Arthur, for the first time drawing Merlin’s attention.

“It’s okay, boy!” Uther cooed, clearly having mistaken Merlin’s horrified expression at Arthur’s presence for maidenly aversion to killing. “They deserve death at a minimum for touching what’s mine.” He ran an appraising eye over Merlin. “But we simply can’t let you go home, it’s not safe for an omega! We’ll find something for you to do around the castle to keep you busy. Perhaps in my chambers...”

“There’s pus! Soooo much pus!” Squeaked Merlin.

“Terribly contagious sire.” Added Gaius hopefully. “I’ve never seen a worse case of pustulent penis.”

Clearly as court physician Gaius had clout, because Uther sighed regretfully and declared, “Arthur, you're in need of a new manservant."

**Author's Note:**

> the burning sickness in Arthurian times was probably gonorrhea


End file.
